Now and Then.

Go to a grade 1 primary school student and ask – how much is two times two? The answer is thoughtless and instantaneous - Four. Similarly I often question myself these days – what is fuck times fuck?
The answer is again thoughtless, immediate and eternal – my own life.
Nostalgia – you named your blog. What is that it has in it? It smells of piss. Now that she pisses in an assholes shit pot. She is really fucked up- literally. What about me? I am coming to that.

You stand on the seventh floor of your office, looking at the beautiful, picturesque Kerala – the sea bordering at one side and the mountain covering the other. It does not enchant you, not anymore. Only one thought reverberates – you are a prisoner with no release date. You are trapped. You have no escape from this heaven. You cannot go back to the hell – where normal and mean people live.

Nostalgia – a great life, young naïve dreams, success, joy - then.

Now – suffocation, hollowness, skipped lunches – dinners, lonely, nowhere, mechanical, computerized, drunk, pissed, shaken, dreamless, aimless, shapeless, non- existent, undefined, trivial – so called Software Engineer – damn you! Fuck you!

Beautiful moments can neither be recreated nor relived. No matter how hard you try. But still -Will ever now and then interchange?